Hi God,

It’s nearly Christmas and I was thinking about the first time we met today; well, the first time I met You. I didn’t realize it’s been as long as it has since that moment You first spoke to me. It’s a powerful memory, one I still recall with tears welled up in my eyes. You were tender, kind, loving… present.

I know a lot of people who know You. It seems that either they’ve always known You or they came to know you somewhere… somehow. But you were different with me. I didn’t come to You, You came to me. You came to this frightened child and whispered Your presence.

I didn’t know You. I knew of You, but little about You. I didn’t realize up until that day that You wanted me to talk to You. I had no idea. You knew that though, that’s why you came to me. You wanted to talk. You wanted me to know You were with me, always with me. You wanted to spend time together. You, the invincible Creator of the Universe who has roamed this earth as pillars of fire would gently walk to school with me every day. You patiently listened to me and would respond in Your unique way. You and I, we had this great way of communicating, kind of like a special code. It was just the way You liked it. I got to know You as my protective traveler those days…

You stayed with me. Sometimes I wonder why. I didn’t always stay with You. I got distracted and would wander off, or I’d just run to the next thing, not even thinking about You. I’d mess up, fall down, hurt You in ways I wasn’t even aware of, but still, You stayed with me.

We’ve learned to communicate in different ways. You wrote me this amazing Love Letter a long time ago and I read it over and over again. Sometimes, I listen to the audio version and fall asleep to it. I love Your Letter. Over the years, and especially lately, You speak to me through people. I love it when You send messages to me through others. I have to admit, sometimes my favorite way of communicating is through “billboards.” Not the kind on the highway (although they speak to me sometimes too), but those WOW messages You say to me. You know me; You know I need to hear definitive answers. Things can easily get lost in translation with me, and You are kind enough to be clear. Your clarity always brings me peace in the end.

I think the most amazing thing about You is this: despite the fact that I can be a really terrible friend and child; that I have defied You, challenged You, said terrible things when I’ve been upset, You – the almighty Creator who has the hand to destroy all You have made – You would still come to me as You did all those many years ago, and You would step down from Your glory into this world – a sick, dark, hurting world who often times despises You – and You would die for me all over again; You would die for everyone all over again.

I just wanted to write to You and thank You for all these wonderful years that You have been in my life. I’m sorry for the times I’ve let You down, and I thank You for Your grace and mercy. Thank You for hearing my prayers and only answering “yes” to those You know are best for me. Thank You for the work You do in others’ lives when I reach out to You on their behalf. Thank You for the blessings You have given me and I pray that I would use each and every one to make you proud and smile. Most of all, I want You to know that I love You, more than words could ever say – and that’s ok, because I know that You know full well the depth of my love for You.

Merry Christmas,

April